As I am walking to my favourite spot in the park nearby, it feels like I need to make a new post on my blog with this title.
Recently I figured out that the pains we feel as grown-ups are created when we are children.
One of mine old wounds is “nobody believes me”, this had haunted me since age 7. It comes back once in a while but recently it comes back sooner and sooner, so I started working on that, I began to see a pattern.
Whilst I am writing this a cute little wild bunny comes out to play on the grass, and another one… and another one, so playful ❤.
The pattern I noticed is that whenever I get the feeling someone is not believing me , I go into defensive mode, I get upset, because I am not a liar, I get mad and eventually I just drop the whole matter and let them, the other(s), think whatever they want… It really frustrates me. Sometimes the universe is on my side and the “non-believer” quickly learns that I was talking the truth.
I need to learn to step out of this pattern and to go into dialogue with whomever that does not believe me.
I am learning, it is not easy, but I see the pattern emerge more quickly then before, so I can act sooner and try not to go too deep in the emotion of playing the victim AND I try to talk about how I feel with the people who brought up this wound.
Old wounds have a tendency to touch you harder then it should, it feels like it is infested, which makes you overreact.
Knowing that you are overreacting is already a win, you noticed it, that is the first step in healing. Now you can start working with these feelings, turning them into something useful. Sit in your pain and let the pain subside… Maybe there is no need to react, or you just have to explain yourself better… Or let people know what is bothering you, so you can talk it through.
It will take more than just one effort to heal old wounds, but you will get better in handling those overreactions, I promise 😃.
Good luck and thanks for reading.